Rommel
Years back, I was going through a particularly rough time. I had people talking behind my back in this organization I am the head of, criticizing not only my management style but also my personal life. The bashers did everything they could think of the destroy me and my reputation, wrote unsigned letters to my immediate boss, at our head office, even went to the extent of sending anonymous messages to radio stations, which all the media jumped at like vultures. I do not know why, even now, what these bashers had in mind. Perhaps there really was something 'off' with my management, and the person I am, for them to be prompted to do those things. That is their privilege, so what to do?
Anyway, I remember this moment during that time when I was in the middle of a meeting with local officials and I got this call from my immediate boss, to tell me he heard these nasty rumors going around about me, and that he just wanted me to know that he was there for me when I needed him. He offered consolation and pieces of advice. Sad thing was, the rumors were all too personal so I welled up. I had to get up and leave the meeting for a bit, because the tears started to flow and I did not want people to see. Running behind me was Rommel, my bestie, (I can say that for sure), who put a hand on my shoulder and said nothing. He was just there, rubbing my back, and said nothing.
Small things say a lot. Like little acts of kindness show plenty about a person's character. I have always believed that. Which is why it is a very bad idea for someone to act 'funny' when we meet or when I engage in conversations with him/her the first time, because I immediately 'see through' the other person's character. And values. It is not 'first impressions', I have this gift of just knowing what another person is like, just by observing. Call me a witch, but I am right about ninety percent of the time. So that was how I once and for all concluded that Rommel has a good heart, character and remarkable values. Simply by that moment we had.
Rommel has been a friend for decades, I can't remember a time when I was in this organization that he was not there for the milestones. Then I became his boss. Many among our colleagues knew that he is a friend, a close one at that. They knew that he could tell me anything he wanted. They knew if he asked me for something, he would very well get it and more. They knew that he was their way to me. Now for someone who knows that fully well about himself, what others think of him and our relationship, that someone would probably turn into an arrogant SOB overnight with his colleagues. Of course, Rommel is unique in some ways. For one, he is openly gay. But he never displayed arrogance, any inkling of an SOB, despite our relationship. He never abused it, and he showed me that because he is a close friend, he should conduct himself in a manner that will not embarrass me. He did his job well, worked harder, and proved himself worthy of my trust. There were times I handed him tasks beyond what was in his official duties, like making me look beautiful for the events I was invited to (he was jokingly called my talent manager) and he did it all with enthusiasm.
He went abroad for a while, perhaps because of discontent with the way it was here. But he came home hurriedly, realizing that he was taking care of elderly people in another country when his parents were home with no one to take care of them full-time. I would get overseas calls from him then, and he would always cry over the phone. I simply told him, if his stay abroad was not making him happy, then he better come home. I told him we will face whatever comes at a time of uncertainty, together.
He took his masteral degree a couple of years ago to improve his competencies, and he would always ask for my reassurance about his answers to his case studies and assignments. He, in fact, is a smart guy, but his confidence about all the academic intramurals is low, hence, he would look to me to say he was correct. Because yes, his answers to his assignments were correct. I find that trait of his endearing.
I am not his boss anymore now. Yet even from a distance I know he is there. I know in my heart he is and will always be a friend, no matter what. He embraced me, with all my ugliness, warts and all, and still does. He always tells me whenever he has the chance, that I am still the best boss he ever had, that no one can ever come close to who I am. Coming from Rommel, I am glad. Because this guy tells anyone as it is, no sugarcoating. I want to tell him now, that I embraced him, with all his ugliness, warts and all, and I still do. He is one of the best people I have been blessed to have as a friend. And no one will ever come close to who he is.
Anyway, I remember this moment during that time when I was in the middle of a meeting with local officials and I got this call from my immediate boss, to tell me he heard these nasty rumors going around about me, and that he just wanted me to know that he was there for me when I needed him. He offered consolation and pieces of advice. Sad thing was, the rumors were all too personal so I welled up. I had to get up and leave the meeting for a bit, because the tears started to flow and I did not want people to see. Running behind me was Rommel, my bestie, (I can say that for sure), who put a hand on my shoulder and said nothing. He was just there, rubbing my back, and said nothing.
Small things say a lot. Like little acts of kindness show plenty about a person's character. I have always believed that. Which is why it is a very bad idea for someone to act 'funny' when we meet or when I engage in conversations with him/her the first time, because I immediately 'see through' the other person's character. And values. It is not 'first impressions', I have this gift of just knowing what another person is like, just by observing. Call me a witch, but I am right about ninety percent of the time. So that was how I once and for all concluded that Rommel has a good heart, character and remarkable values. Simply by that moment we had.
Rommel has been a friend for decades, I can't remember a time when I was in this organization that he was not there for the milestones. Then I became his boss. Many among our colleagues knew that he is a friend, a close one at that. They knew that he could tell me anything he wanted. They knew if he asked me for something, he would very well get it and more. They knew that he was their way to me. Now for someone who knows that fully well about himself, what others think of him and our relationship, that someone would probably turn into an arrogant SOB overnight with his colleagues. Of course, Rommel is unique in some ways. For one, he is openly gay. But he never displayed arrogance, any inkling of an SOB, despite our relationship. He never abused it, and he showed me that because he is a close friend, he should conduct himself in a manner that will not embarrass me. He did his job well, worked harder, and proved himself worthy of my trust. There were times I handed him tasks beyond what was in his official duties, like making me look beautiful for the events I was invited to (he was jokingly called my talent manager) and he did it all with enthusiasm.
He went abroad for a while, perhaps because of discontent with the way it was here. But he came home hurriedly, realizing that he was taking care of elderly people in another country when his parents were home with no one to take care of them full-time. I would get overseas calls from him then, and he would always cry over the phone. I simply told him, if his stay abroad was not making him happy, then he better come home. I told him we will face whatever comes at a time of uncertainty, together.
He took his masteral degree a couple of years ago to improve his competencies, and he would always ask for my reassurance about his answers to his case studies and assignments. He, in fact, is a smart guy, but his confidence about all the academic intramurals is low, hence, he would look to me to say he was correct. Because yes, his answers to his assignments were correct. I find that trait of his endearing.
I am not his boss anymore now. Yet even from a distance I know he is there. I know in my heart he is and will always be a friend, no matter what. He embraced me, with all my ugliness, warts and all, and still does. He always tells me whenever he has the chance, that I am still the best boss he ever had, that no one can ever come close to who I am. Coming from Rommel, I am glad. Because this guy tells anyone as it is, no sugarcoating. I want to tell him now, that I embraced him, with all his ugliness, warts and all, and I still do. He is one of the best people I have been blessed to have as a friend. And no one will ever come close to who he is.
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